Humor

Each year, the marketing and promotions department works diligently to create promotions and giveaways that will bring fans to the ballpark. In many cases, they are quite successful and these giveaways add to the fun and excitement of the ballpark experience.

But sometimes, these promotions become to mainstream and border on boring. This leaves fans wondering, "What would happen if they tried something a little off-the-wall?"

Having been to all the home games for the Arizona Diamondbacks, I hear this a lot.

Once in a while, the suggestions made are pretty strange and bizarre. This web page is dedicated to those imaginative fans who come up with their own ideas for promotions and giveaways.

We Are Not Alone

Anyone who has watched the FOX network soon realizes that Arizona is a hot bed of alien activity. Whether it be unexplained lights in the skies over Phoenix or abductions of red necks near Flagstaff. The question becomes, what do these aliens want? This question has haunted me since I moved here 6 years ago.

But after watching the Arizona Diamondbacks meteoric rise to the top of the standings, I became suspicious that perhaps they had help. I began digging around the Internet and noticed there were similarities between Diamondbacks players and other humans. This was more than a coincidence but I could not put my finger on an explanation.

Chia Head Box It's strange the ideas I come up with that I think are funny. The idea of Chia Diamondbacks came about after watching the grounds crew carefully grooming the field while the players were warming up. It was meant to be an inside joke for my kids enjoyment.

It got real shortly after I created the Brian Anderson Chia Head. One game as he walked out of the dugout to warm up in the outfield I noticed two players motioning to each other the chia afro growth and laughing. Who knew the Diamondbacks players would stumble upon this or that they too would think this was funny?

Every year at Christmas, the shelves come alive with little pottery creatures. When taken home and properly cared for, you are able to grow fungus, mold, and occasionally chia seeds on the top of these clay heads.

This has become a national craze as collectors rush to gather the new heads as they come out.

As I was walking down the aisles of the local Target, I saw these critters and began to sing the commercial jingle, "Ch-ch-ch-chia!" and wondered, what would happen if the Diamondbacks players licensed their likeness to the makers of Chia pets?

Being the curious sort, I began to visualize the potential for holiday gift giving.

Someone is definitely missing out here, this could be a veritable gold mine. With my trusty game day program, I began working up models of what each player would look like.

I therefore bring you, Chia Diamondbacks!

Chia Gallery	Chia Archive	Growing Instructions

We choose one Chia Diamondback to be showcased for your enjoyment. Stop by and see which player is sprouting a new growth of green foliage	Did you miss one of the showcased Chia Diamondbacks? Not to worry, we have archived all of them so you can always get caught up.	Just getting a Chia Head is only half the fun. You are going to need some instructions to make your Chia Diamondbacks grow.

If you have ideas for Diamondbacks Chia Heads you would like to see, please contact me and I will be sure to include your suggestions.

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Luis Gonzalez was a pleasant surprise last year with his offensive power. He excited fans and teammates alike when he put together a 30-game hitting streak.

But that is nothing compared to what you will get when you start his 30-day growing streak when you water and care for your very own Gonzo Chia head.

Once Gonzo has a full Chia head of greenery, you can cut and style his "do" so that Chia Luis sports the latest look.

With the offensive power that Chia Gonzo possesses, he will be leading the garden in consecutive days of green growth.

Bald